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Saturday, March 13, 2010

March 12, 2010

set apart

i always have been known to go against the flow
we are all followers to some degree for sure
it is built into us
but i remember even as a young person not wanting
to be sucked into commerism and materialism.
i took that to the extreme one Christmas when i refused
to partake in the holiday because i felt we had gone so 
far from the truth of it's real message and i didn't 
want to be hypocritical.

in the 80's i loved to find vintage clothing, 
dye it myself.
i had my own look.

i began to travel when i was out of school
searching for truth.
i looked into hinduism, buddism, bahai, 
i even took a trip to israel to investigate judiasm.
i was fascinated by a race that could endure such tragedies as 
the holocaust and live to tell the tail.

my biggest and radical decision was to follow Christ.
i was very opposed to Christianity over the years:
again the hypocrisy.
so it even came as a surprise to me when i found
myself crying out for mercy to the Christ who i had
resisted for so many years.

the change was radical.
i had a host of habits:
cocaine use, alcohol, pot, extreme bad language and after i begged
for mercy and cleansing 
(after reading psalm 51 one night in my room)
i was totally released from all that had earlier bound me

from that day on He
set me apart.
I believe He sets us all apart once we chose to be His.
the biggest and most profound change was that 
He gave me an "other" focus.
I began to SEE people.. perhaps for the first time in my life.
I began to really care.
I began to want to help.

that hasn't changed over the years.
we are in roatan because we feel called to help here.
pretty sweet place to help.. i must say!

but it comes with cost.
it means leaving family behind.
it means dealing with a culture different from ours 
it means dealing with heat and bugs

today it meant taking a couple of ladies out on a tour
when i am dizzy and not feeling well.
do i regret doing it?
not at all.
am i ignoring my needs?
never.
i want to see dr. raymond last night.
my blood pressure is high.
i need to deal with that.
i have never had this problem before so
we are doing a battery of tests.
i am resting today.

whatever befalls
i will say like asaph the psalmist:
"my heart and my fail may fail but 
God
is 
the strength of my heart
and my portion
forever.

set apart.
i wouldn't have it any other way.
ever.

3 comments:

  1. I'm so impressed with you.

    I developed high blood pressure in my late 40's. I was on birth control pills and I attributed it to that. I've been on medicine ever since - 2 meds, very low dosage and they've done the trick. Of course I stopped the birth control pills, but I still needed the meds to control the bp. I don't know how old you are but many of my friends are finding that their bp goes up in their late 50's - early 60's. I know you're not as old as me, but it could just be a function of age.

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  2. i am 51 right now. i have never had any BP problems before. been dizzy, shaky and headachy for about a week off and on. went to the dr. last evening to find out that my BP is high. he has ordered a bunch of blood work and other tests to see if we can get to the bottom of this.

    i have been resting today. just wish the headache would go away. oh the joys of getting older.

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  3. Amazing words...made me really stop and think...thanks for sharing.

    Sherrye aka: hapaphoto

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